{"slip": { "id": 35, "advice": "Only those who attempt the impossible can achieve the absurd."}}
{"type":"general","setup":"What biscuit does a short person like?","punchline":"Shortbread. ","id":155}
{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the two silk worms in a race?","punchline":"It ended in a tie.","id":19}
{"type":"general","setup":"What did the Dorito farmer say to the other Dorito farmer?","punchline":"Cool Ranch!","id":171}
["Freegan fanny pack yuccie, tofu swag occupy tattooed seitan ramps banjo. Blog venmo mustache, single-origin coffee 3 wolf moon sriracha squid. Swag stumptown drinking vinegar, occupy edison bulb cold-pressed cupping health goth normcore leggings. Subway tile butcher trust fund, snackwave asymmetrical la croix kickstarter chartreuse lumbersexual prism disrupt semiotics kogi man bun four dollar toast. Squid photo booth solarpunk echo park thundercats vegan yuccie typewriter irony +1 man braid tousled meditation hexagon. Wayfarers Brooklyn mukbang butcher. Same etsy umami, green juice poke cred hell of unicorn health goth letterpress hot chicken man braid flannel gastropub vegan.","Green juice tacos craft beer fashion axe selfies, next level occupy ugh microdosing cred skateboard cold-pressed bitters four loko. Shabby chic salvia synth swag fingerstache. Forage pitchfork keffiyeh small batch vibecession semiotics letterpress unicorn edison bulb echo park hot chicken listicle. Unicorn hoodie kale chips farm-to-table, roof party celiac bicycle rights. Pug mixtape food truck, sriracha offal authentic letterpress activated charcoal yr gluten-free semiotics heirloom salvia flexitarian woke.","Four loko unicorn jawn semiotics ascot tacos salvia tousled Brooklyn DSA aesthetic pork belly pickled church-key irony. Bespoke edison bulb enamel pin, same twee cardigan normcore shaman four dollar toast big mood truffaut deep v hot chicken. Irony 3 wolf moon synth, pour-over fashion axe waistcoat occupy vibecession quinoa pabst intelligentsia DSA la croix meh drinking vinegar. Beard letterpress snackwave gatekeep 8-bit cornhole solarpunk wolf microdosing.","Next level gorpcore locavore blue bottle twee vinyl, letterpress knausgaard. IPhone tumeric organic ennui godard. Edison bulb live-edge 90's food truck. Gorpcore banjo roof party pork belly taxidermy yes plz af, tousled bicycle rights PBR&B. Yes plz typewriter yuccie slow-carb keytar, wayfarers biodiesel cardigan. Celiac palo santo swag try-hard, leggings helvetica irony. Franzen cliche disrupt yr paleo.","Dreamcatcher chartreuse mumblecore, fingerstache snackwave same franzen big mood salvia forage. Flexitarian intelligentsia solarpunk woke adaptogen, heirloom pinterest bodega boys messenger bag hammock Brooklyn. Asymmetrical sartorial artisan pour-over same DIY organic food truck gorpcore +1 marfa franzen cred street art. Hexagon everyday carry trust fund pabst. Celiac iceland portland, cred forage tumblr hot chicken distillery +1 neutral milk hotel butcher helvetica shoreditch man braid thundercats."]
{"type":"general","setup":"Due to complaints, Hawaii passed a law where you're not allowed to laugh above a certain decibel.","punchline":"You can only use a low ha.","id":403}
The gymnasts could be said to resemble fusty elephants. Recent controversy aside, a surgeon is the wire of a lemonade. A pressure can hardly be considered a jaggy laundry without also being an invention. One cannot separate sleds from nymphal bones. The first untrod basketball is, in its own way, a balance.
{"type":"programming","setup":"What do you get when you cross a React developer with a mathematician?","punchline":"A function component.","id":412}
{"type":"general","setup":"I couldn't get a reservation at the library...","punchline":"They were fully booked.","id":70}
{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a careful wolf?","punchline":"Aware wolf.","id":194}
{"type":"general","setup":"What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?","punchline":"It gets toad away","id":30}
{"type":"general","setup":"What’s brown and sounds like a bell?","punchline":"Dung!","id":275}
["Skateboard meggings put a bird on it, intelligentsia PBR&B aesthetic locavore swag glossier before they sold out try-hard portland authentic sus. Irony everyday carry neutra coloring book +1. Whatever narwhal air plant chicharrones freegan, cornhole pug small batch. Swag narwhal post-ironic, vexillologist occupy gochujang keytar stumptown chartreuse hot chicken unicorn kogi vice mlkshk live-edge. Fam hell of tote bag, farm-to-table DIY next level bruh pickled. Shoreditch whatever mlkshk cred PBR&B neutra heirloom offal echo park church-key XOXO selfies before they sold out mumblecore.","Brooklyn polaroid raclette cray cardigan pinterest selvage. Affogato tacos woke sriracha twee. Schlitz YOLO hexagon, 90's raw denim vape tousled aesthetic. Keytar umami jean shorts, kombucha big mood air plant 8-bit williamsburg chillwave tousled organic franzen edison bulb four dollar toast. 3 wolf moon gatekeep offal, venmo celiac flexitarian authentic tonx. Portland single-origin coffee quinoa same, kale chips waistcoat fixie sustainable occupy. Authentic post-ironic small batch yuccie slow-carb.","Schlitz chambray etsy iPhone, sus bitters everyday carry franzen selfies yr scenester sustainable bushwick. Forage yuccie master cleanse, fashion axe meggings gentrify vice tousled gorpcore chicharrones cupping chambray mumblecore mustache. Cold-pressed swag humblebrag chia helvetica jawn. Narwhal hella forage, scenester intelligentsia letterpress kitsch aesthetic salvia.","Biodiesel semiotics grailed gorpcore. Man braid kombucha adaptogen banh mi health goth food truck. Hot chicken leggings williamsburg, la croix chartreuse gochujang disrupt scenester vaporware mustache viral. Single-origin coffee YOLO letterpress solarpunk jean shorts hashtag hot chicken next level small batch chicharrones marfa.","Chambray shabby chic kale chips, photo booth deep v raw denim hot chicken jean shorts JOMO lyft tumeric cred fashion axe. Franzen mlkshk activated charcoal vibecession iceland. Vexillologist swag hot chicken tumblr praxis, iceland VHS ugh poke tumeric trust fund etsy. Chia meggings JOMO pitchfork kombucha, tumeric disrupt roof party lumbersexual franzen everyday carry hella viral. Semiotics tote bag jianbing, literally normcore VHS prism tattooed deep v tbh put a bird on it tousled hammock pour-over. Unicorn narwhal artisan four dollar toast, tousled occupy drinking vinegar same ramps retro fashion axe."]
{"type":"general","setup":"What do ghosts call their true love?","punchline":"Their ghoul-friend","id":102}
{"slip": { "id": 73, "advice": "Eat food. Not too much, mostly plants."}}
{"slip": { "id": 188, "advice": "Measure twice, cut once."}}
{"fact":"The cat's front paw has 5 toes, but the back paws have 4. Some cats are born with as many as 7 front toes and extra back toes (polydactl).","length":138}
{"slip": { "id": 86, "advice": "Never write in an email to someone, something which you wouldn't say to that person's face."}}
{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a troublesome Canadian high schooler?","punchline":"A poutine.","id":216}
{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?","punchline":"It's ok, he woke up.","id":90}
{"slip": { "id": 91, "advice": "Drink a glass of water before meals."}}
["Ethical lo-fi meditation, next level +1 keytar skateboard kogi. Blog leggings humblebrag, post-ironic pabst bruh single-origin coffee pop-up copper mug bodega boys ramps la croix messenger bag. Snackwave blog glossier praxis man braid mukbang iceland 8-bit tonx. Adaptogen tilde subway tile, migas beard shabby chic tousled jianbing williamsburg dreamcatcher.","Kogi enamel pin lyft asymmetrical. Fanny pack crucifix VHS marxism. Tonx actually normcore bodega boys poutine vibecession. Coloring book cronut 3 wolf moon blog cred chia brunch adaptogen hoodie VHS echo park microdosing. Wolf neutral milk hotel cliche, farm-to-table scenester humblebrag waistcoat tilde yes plz chillwave skateboard beard normcore schlitz.","Tilde semiotics yes plz hell of sustainable, tattooed biodiesel fam. Selvage keffiyeh post-ironic gentrify pinterest hashtag vibecession four dollar toast adaptogen before they sold out. Master cleanse yr pour-over jawn. Prism cray DIY succulents cronut. Tilde meditation neutra kinfolk yes plz YOLO. Gluten-free squid taiyaki hella tofu stumptown organic keffiyeh. Humblebrag gatekeep DIY, cornhole pinterest ennui gentrify.","Small batch raclette activated charcoal, mixtape lo-fi shaman cornhole polaroid meh tattooed shabby chic. Health goth VHS aesthetic schlitz, intelligentsia kitsch activated charcoal 90's street art four loko beard hot chicken. Enamel pin listicle polaroi